Hugh's Views

Personal Reflections of 1995

As 1995 has drawn to a close and the new year has begun, I thought this might be a good time to reflect on the events of this year from a personal perspective and throw my thoughts out to a small but, in my mind, important audience in cyberspace. Changes This was a year of changes for me. It was the last year I'll be able to say I'm forty-something. I turn the big "five-oh" in March. It was a year where two lives changed for me. One departed and one arrived. The One Who Went Away Our family was saddened by the loss of a dear close friend. Ray and I attended high school together, shared our personal thoughts through three decades, and were always there for each other in times of need and celebration. The holiday season was hard without the man who spent every Christmas Eve with us in an annual event that included festive food, good talk and the exchange of gifts. Ray was like an uncle to our three girls, and a brother to my wife and me. His death was no great surprise. We knew it was only a matter of time before the AIDS he had contracted several years earlier would finally take him. It was so difficult for him those last few months. He was becoming an old man before our eyes and before his time. To his credit he continued to live on his own with his beloved dogs, steadfastly refusing to leave that life and those trustworthy companions who were so dear to him. He will be sorely missed. He was a good man. The same week Ray died U.S. Senator Jesse Helms pronounced that federal funding for AIDS research should be cut, that it served gay men right to get this disease and that God was using the ailment to punish them. I was shocked at this cruel and shortsighted remark. It makes me ill that such men actually think this way and casually pontificate their own narrow viewpoints. World leaders should do all in their power to eradicate this affliction, support research and make the lives of the suffering more tolerable until a cure is found. The New Arrival Ninety-Five was also the year that our family started a new generation in the diminutive form of our new granddaughter, Sabrina. It still feels weird to be called grandfather. I'm beginning to enjoy it, though. This new entity will spend most of her life in another century, unlike we baby-boomers, who have spent most of our life during the last half of the Twentieth Century. I now know why some people have bumper-stickers beseeching the reader to "ask about my grandchild." It's a feeling of pride and deep love for a growing spirit; one who responds in the most basic of ways. The tentative smile, the surprised laugh, the pleading cry when something is wrong. Total trust and helplessness wrapped up in a bundle no bigger than a sack of potatoes (Yes, Dan Quail, you do add an E to potato when it becomes plural. That means more than one, Danny-Boy.) ...and in Conclusion I am optimistic for this new year. The "web" will continue to expand, sending thoughts across oceans and into other cultures. Anyone with access to the World Wide Web can read these words. I've read and enjoyed the words of many other people around the world. I've also puzzled at words in other languages and made conjectures about the source and context. Pictures make it easier, but they slow the downloading process. I, personally, enjoy seeing graphics used to augment the words used in web pages, even baby pictures. But then again, what do you expect from a person who shamelessly displays images of his own family?Hugh Peebles

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